hazy stars

It Was Another Man

Samuel Langhorne Clemens, better known by his pen name Mark Twain, was infamous for his keen wit and humor. He was a man of many hats: humorist, novelist, writer, and lecturer. Some even say that he was the most popular American celebrity of his time.

In his later life, he was a very depressed man. His salience in society declined. He died in May of 1897.

Or did he? Actually, Mark Twain died on April 21, 1910. Ironically, for a man whose life centered around satire, Mark Twain received notice of a premature obituary. He responded to this rumor by sending The New York Journal this note:

"James Ross Clemens, a cousin of mine, was seriously ill two or three weeks ago and is well now. The report of my illness grew from his illness, the report of my death was an exaggeration." -Mark Twain

In November of 1897 Twain sent this note to friend Frank E. Bliss:

"It has been reported that I was seriously ill--it was another man; dying--it was another man; dead--the other man again...As far as I can see, nothing remains to be reported, except that I have become a foreigner. When you hear it, don't you believe it. And don't take the trouble to deny it. Merely just raise the American flag on our house in Hartford and let it talk."

November 15, 1902, Harper's Bazaar published Mark Twain's short story entitled, "Amended Obituaries."

How did it all really go down? He wrote in 1909, "I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it." And so he did. Halley's comet can be seen in the Earth's skies once every 75-76 years. It was visible on November 1835, when Mark Twain was born and was also visible on April 1910, when he died.

Mark Twain has not been the only man to witness his own obituary. Alfred Nobel read in his obituary that he created the Nobel Prize in order to redeem himself. In it he was called “the merchant of death." On two separate occasions pre-written obituaries of entertainer Bob Hope were accidentally released on news web sites. Along with his wife, Ernest Hemmingway was declared dead after being involved in an African plane crash in 1954. They both were very much alive. Wikipedia has a list here.

Weird Opinions

Most of my time is spent in the city of Columbus and its neighboring suburbs. This past Sunday, I took one of my first excursions out in the actual state of Ohio. When the weather is stable, autumn is quite possibly my favorite season. Crisp fresh air with little humidity. Bright blue skies with plump, fluffy white clouds. Trees bursting with a colorful spectrum of leaves ranging golden yellow to fire red. Ideal temperature is too chilly for tee-shirts, but too warm for a scarf and gloves. Absolutely perfect.

Sunday was immaculate. The day possessed every one of the aforementioned traits. And then some. I traveled with Shannon, a friend I acquired through my younger sister. He is by far of one the most intelligent humans on this planet. This is not merely just my opinion. It is an indisputable fact. (Note: I did say one of the most intelligent, not necessarily the most. I am a firm believer in the theory of multiple intelligences. It would be extremely narrow-minded to use only one facet to determine intelligence.)

In any case, Shannon is brilliant. His concentration is in nuclear engineering. His knowledge base includes a vast range of subjects beyond this as well. We spent at least 12 hours engaged in intense intellectual conversation while on our trip. The projects he is currently involved in are extremely complex. Listening to someone talk about developing 5 billion dollar nuclear reactors is ridiculously impressive, yet too extensive to completely grasp. Although his specialization is entirely outside my realm of understanding, it was stimulating information to listen to. Shannon was able to tell me how many years he thought man had before the effects of global warming would be irreversible. He calculated the number himself, as if it were as easy as 2 plus 2.

In the course of a week, Shannon finds his time consumed with a million things. Traveling from coast to coast to speak in conferences. He is responsible for writing elaborate research proposals. Cancer proposal one minute, nuclear reactor the next. Free time is spent helping professors with research and fellow students in the lab. On the side he is developing a system for pumping water in Africa. He conceived the idea when he traveled there. He literally looked at the situation and immediately saw a solution. My mind can even begin to comprehend the level of analysis it would take. And this kid can do it without blinking.

First kiss, schmirst kiss. How many of your friends can recall the first time they created a new atom? A new element? Shannon can.

Is he even human? Well, funny thing is: He is very human. His greatest struggle is finding the balance between being a data-driven robot and an emotion-driven human being. He must learn when to turn off the emotions and become a work machine. Time is money in his world. Not hundreds of dollars, but billions of dollars. Time is also minutes of people's lives. He is in a constant race against time. Emotion only complicates things.

This is hard for someone like me to comprehend. My world is fueled by human emotion. My passion is studying the way people think, feel, and act. Can one completely escape emotion?

Shannon must separate himself from emotions while working. Lives depend on it. Yet, he still allows himself to be human. Our road trip, hike, and farmer's market stop may not sound as important as developing advanced nuclear fuel cycles that will be needed for next-generation nuclear energy systems. Like with any job, though, all work and no play can only equal a burnout. The last thing we want is the hope of the world turning into a pile of schizophrenic scrambled eggs.

This is why Shannon and I engaged in several topics of conversation outside of his normal realm. Everyone needs a mental break from time to time. Most of our conversations were psychologically based and philosophical in nature. He shared many interesting stories with me. One story in particular struck me as slightly disturbing. He had a serious girlfriend a few years back that treated him poorly. She had a habit of telling him "your opinion doesn't matter, you're weird." Since her opinion did matter to him, Shannon actually accepted this crazy notion. The irony of the situation? He is constantly being flown around the country to speak at conferences. Many professors, students, military personnel, and government professionals come to him specifically for his weird opinion. Why? Because it matters. Take that Ms. Bigoted Ex-Girlfriend.

It is extremely relieving to know someone capable of impacting the world at such a large scale. It would be ignorant to think the human race is not in trouble. We all are responsible for doing our part to help. Even if our part is just helping the movers and shakers to relax. They are not robots. They need love too. All Shannon really wants is someone to put a hand on his shoulder. Someone to tell him it's going to be ok.

It's going to be ok, kid.